Remarkable Reading #20: Ty Tashiro's THE SCIENCE OF HAPPILY EVER AFTER and Tim Halloran's ROMANCING THE BRAND
The aim of this section Remarkable Reading is pay a tribute to the books that taught, share trends & insights into where our world in the 21st century is heading in a technology enabled world, and ask the right questions.
Bolded and italics quotes and references do not belong to myself and belong directly to the author. The focus is to share valuable insights and teachings from the book to win business for the authors.
Two Trends I wanted to share core insights on are:
- Specific details on the science of love, how to choose a great mate, romance, dating, & relationships in the 21st Century
- Successful new-age marketing & product innovation in the 21st Century
Ty Tashiro’s THE SCIENCE OF HAPPILY EVER AFTER: What Really Matters in the Quest for Enduring Love is fundamentally a scientific exploration of how to choose a great mate and relationship. It is easily one of the most absorbing and winning books about the new technological age, and what really matters in the 21st Century when it comes to love and settling down.
Ty Tashiro as an author has a distinct, specialized and detailed style writing style, and constantly asks the right crucial questions to bring forth what the right answers are. It’s not often the answers that are fascinating, as Tashiro’s approach in asking the right questions.
Top Take-out’s are:
Page 5 - "I began to learn about the science of falling in love, staying in love and losing love. My early research was focused on the endings of relationships - specifically, whether relationship breakups or divorce would lead to personal growth that might improve future relationships. In one of our first studies, Patricia Frazier and I asked ninety-two undergraduates experiencing a recent breakup to "describe what positive life changes, if any, have happened as a result of your breakup that might serge to improve your future romantic relationships" We found that that the average participant reported five positive life changes, which included improved friendships, feeling more-self confident and learning how to better communicate. To our surprise, will choose a better partner in the future" was one of the most cited types of a growth"
Page 8 - "For most of the five thousand years that marriage has existed, deciding whether you were in love with a partner did not matter, because until the eighteenth century marriage was primarily an economic arrangement between families. Stephanie Coontz is an anthropological researcher at the Evergreen State College who studies the historical context of marriage, and she explains that the potential for sons and daughters to fall in love was rarely the primary criterion used by parents when choosing their children's partners. Decisions were more often based on how much livestock or brand could be exchanged for a daughter's hand in marriage"
Page 11 - "So , falling in love sounds simple, but requiring both liking and lust to be in love actually creates a very complex situation. Most relationship types can endure based on just one kind of love, such as friendships based on compassionate or companionate love, or purely sexual relationships like "hook-ups" or "friends with benefits", which are narrowly based on erotic love. However, being IN LOVE with someone requires a complex mixture of love, one associated with liking (companionate, companionate) and lust (erotic, passionate). Imagining how unhappy you would be with a romantic relationship if when asked about it, you replied, "It's great except that I don't like hanging out with her...."or "It's great, except that I am physically repulsed by him....", Thus, when it comes to finding someone with whom we can fall in love, that someone is expected to provide the forms of love we yes to describe our relationships with friends, pets family and hook-ups"
Page 18 - "Most people yearn for passionate love, that lasts forever, which is not entirely the fault of the hopeless romantic. As we will see, the message we receive from our environments about what love is and how it is found are often irrational and unhelpful. Our social environments - which include our parents, friends and the mass media to name a few sources- provide a narrative or a "how-to" about how we should fall in love. These messages strongly share our beliefs about what love should be and about the partners we choose to love"
Page 20 - "What they found is that most of the films depict protagonists falling in love within minutes, portrait physical beauty as an "ideal" and end with the couple "loving happily ever after". So it is not surprising that when you ask children what they wish for in love, many can provide elaborate descriptions of future marital partners who will be beautiful, brilliant and brave"
Page 31 - "Relationships begin with two people meet for the first time, become attracted to one another and then try to make a relationship work. How two people combine in a relationship is well illustrated by a principle many of us learned in elementary school".
page 102 - "There are no studies that I am aware of that have examined the link between physical attractiveness and long term relationship stability. In the absence of direct assessments, let's consider whether there are theoretical reasons to believe that physical attractiveness would increase relationship stability just by virtue of still being alive. However in wealthy nations there is no association between attractiveness and longevity. Even if a relationship between attractiveness and health remained, would there be a big difference between choosing a partners who lived to seventy six years of age, versus event eight"?
Page 245 - "Choosing partner who are in line with helping you achieve your long-term goals will likely lead you to partners who treat you better and relationship experiences that are more gratifying. This cycle of acting in ways that are congruent with your long-term goals in relationships"
I recently blogged about a new mobile application INVENTUS: #7 GLASS OF WINE that is somewhat inspired by this last take-out:
Page 245 - "Choosing partner who are in line with helping you achieve your long-term goals will likely lead you to partners who treat you better and relationship experiences that are more gratifying. This cycle of acting in ways that are congruent with your long-term goals in relationships"
ROMANCING THE BRAND: How Brands Create Strong, Intimate Relationships with Consumers is an extremely smooth, efficient and effortless marketing book that sets the right tones on how brand marketers can engage closer with brands, and build more integrated and intimate relationships with consumers.
Tim Halloran’s experience in simplifying the complex details shines through, and he succeeds in compellingly teaching us what the power of an online conversation means to a brand in the 21st Century marketing age.
The top key take-outs are:
Page 14 - "The secret of successful marketing in this new age - the essential evolutionary next step - lies in creating nurturing a powerful, passionate and genuine relationship between the brand and consumer. The strongest brands have always viewed their consumer base in relational manner - not as an entity to be taken advantage of but as a partner to engage, delight and excite." Creating and managing strong relationships will be marketer's best answer to our critics, and our best shot at reviving the integrity of our professional. More important, this new approach will help a cyclical consumer base start trusting us again. It's a paradigm shift that can bring new peer, purpose, and effectiveness to a marketers work"
Page 54 - "The idea was a very social and conversational idea. Those aren't going to come up using big data or analytics. Consumers are more than numbers, and they are more than surveys. Big data doesn't tell us how to reach a consumer at the emotional or soulful level. Big data doesn't socialize. To truly cement a relationship, you have to converse, and being a good brand steward requires that you listen to conversations. if you don't you will miss the special moment, the key insight, the magic ingredient that cements the potential for "romance"
Page 71 - "This is truly what the brand owns. For Volvo it's "safe cars", For Disney it is "family magic". For Coca-Cola it is "authentic happiness". For Wal-Mart it is "low prices everyday". For jack Daniels it is "American masculinity" The brand essence for smart water might be "helps me look and feel my best". Now being a younger brand, smart water is nowhere near these other brands in establishing this essence"
You can follow Ty Tashiro on Twitter here, purchase a copy of THE SCIENCE OF HAPPILY EVER AFTER on Amazon here.
You can follow Tim Halloran on Twitter here, and purchase a copy of ROMANCING THE BRAND on Amazon here
Thank you,
Praz
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